Nikki Glaser’s second stint hosting the Golden Globes was a resounding success, filled with sharp wit and fearless jabs. Her jokes landed with a punch, from playfully criticizing the broadcast network to cheekily addressing Leonardo DiCaprio’s well-documented dating preferences. But beneath the polished performance lay a trove of material deemed too risky for the live broadcast.
The comedian revealed a hidden “Stern File” on her phone – a digital repository of jokes that didn’t make the cut. This collection, shared during an interview, offered a fascinating glimpse into the boundaries of acceptable humor at a high-profile event. It showcased a willingness to push limits, even when those limits were firmly in place.
One censored joke targeted Sydney Sweeney, whose film *Christy* experienced a remarkably poor box office performance. Glaser’s original line playfully highlighted the disconnect between Sweeney’s star power and the film’s dismal earnings, describing it as a movie featuring “a lesbian who just bounced around in tiny shorts for two hours” that made a mere $14. The joke was ultimately scrapped because Sweeney wasn’t in attendance.
Sean Penn was a frequent target, both during the show and in the discarded material. While a joke about Penn “slowly morphing into a sexy leather handbag” did make it to air, other lines were deemed too harsh. These included a jab about “best neck veins” and a comparison to “the defiant last tree standing in a rainforest.”
Comedian David Spade even contributed to the Penn roasting session, suggesting he was “taking *The Substance* wrong” – a pointed reference to the unsettling body horror film. Glaser also considered a joke about Penn, Benicio del Toro, and Leonardo DiCaprio, collectively labeling them “Least Eyes” for their characteristic squinting expressions.
Leonardo DiCaprio himself wasn’t spared from the cutting room floor. Beyond the jokes that made it on stage, Glaser had prepared a line about his age gap in relationships, quipping that he squints to “read his girlfriend’s ID” and ensure the year “starts with a 2.” It was a particularly biting observation, highlighting a recurring pattern in his personal life.
Even a Golden Globe nominee, Chase Infiniti, wasn’t immune to Glaser’s comedic radar. A joke about Infiniti’s unique name playfully suggested it was a promotional opportunity, offering “5% cash back on all travel booked through her.” It was a clever, unexpected twist on the typical awards show fanfare.
Julia Roberts, a Hollywood icon, also had a joke prepared about her film *After the Hunt*. Glaser’s line playfully suggested the film’s plot revolved around “finding someone who’s seen it,” a self-deprecating jab at potentially obscure or overlooked movies.
Jonathan Bailey, recently crowned People’s Sexiest Man Alive, was another target. Glaser’s joke acknowledged Bailey’s historic achievement as the first openly gay man to receive the title, then wryly pointed out the need to specify “openly” given the past winners. It was a smart, socially aware observation.
Jeff Goldblum’s long-standing partnership with Apartments.com also almost became a punchline. Glaser envisioned a joke about Goldblum simply “wandering in” from a nearby commercial shoot, highlighting his ubiquitous presence in the advertising world.
Finally, Brad Pitt was slated for a joke about Hollywood’s double standards regarding aging. Glaser’s line contrasted Pitt’s role as a racecar driver at 60 with the limited roles available to women over 35, often relegated to playing “tired moms who hate their life.” It was a pointed commentary on the industry’s ingrained biases.
